It was a few minutes before 10pm on a fall Saturday night on the west side of Chicago. I just met up with a friend from Ohio for a drink at a fantastic Irish sports bar. I was walking back to my car, parked a few blocks away, to head to a friend's 33rd birthday party when I passed a man who was a bit unkempt on the street. He asked me if I could spare some change; unfortunately, I had no cash. He then asked for one of the alcoholic beverages I had just bought, and I told him, "I'm sorry, I'm on my way to a party." As soon as I walked past him, I felt terrible. I was in a hurry, a couple hours late for the party, but that was no reason not to give him time.
I got to my car and ventured in the direction he was walking. I saw him, found a spot, and hopped out of my car to talk to him. I introduced myself, and I asked his name. I do that every time I meet someone on the street. He told me his name was Shawn. I remember the spelling because my brothers name is Sean, there is a bit of pride in the way to spell a name. It's not quite to the level of Stephen vs Steven, but it's up there. As I was talking to Shawn we were near a Potbelly so I asked if he wanted something to eat, he said he would love a Pizza Melt so I went in and got him one.
After I gave him his sandwich, we talked, and I asked how long he had been on the street. He told me he has been on the street for 9 years and a little of his story. Shawn shared that he has been battling an addiction to opiates due to long-term pain but that he was clean when he first ended up on the streets. The lifestyle of living on the streets led to him putting himself in some dire circumstances, and at one point, he got a bullet in his arm. The bullet was a ricochet shot from a homemade gun, which he described in great detail. He showed me the wound, and it looked very painful like it had been there untreated for a while. He said he was thinking about going back to the hospital, but he hated going there. He said he has been labeled a pill-seeker, and most of the time, the staff would try to treat him without giving any pain medicine. This led to him seeking relief from other less-than-reliable sources.
Shawn shared that he had a $150-a-day opiate habit at one point last year and that he was now down to $20 a day. I was surprised when he said $150 a day, and I asked how he could afford that. He mentioned one intersection downtown where people commonly hand out $ 10's & $ 20's. If he wasn't using the money to get relief from the pain, then he said he would end up defending himself from other people who saw the money. Shawn said he was close to giving up, that 9 years on the street had worn him down to his breaking point, but that he was in the mindset of bettering himself. I encouraged him to continue trying to be 1% better each day, something I picked up recently from reading Atomic Habits.
Shawn then hit me with a story from a great book "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill. He was pleasantly surprised that I had read the book, and he brought up the story of the gold prospector. For those unfamiliar, in the book, there was a story of a prospector named RU Darby who bought a piece of land in Colorado during the gold rush and, after weeks of manual labor, had found gold. After discovering, he borrowed money from his family to afford the machinery needed to extract the gold. They shipped one car and were dreaming of all they would do with the rest. Then, all of a sudden, the vein disappeared. The gold was gone, and after they continued drilling for a while, they decided to give up and sell the machinery to a "scrap" man. The "scrap" man used the "who, not how" philosophy and consulted with a mining engineer who calculated the vein was just 3 feet from where Darby stopped drilling. The "scrap" man made a massive fortune from the mine. This could have been a terrible story that negatively impacted Darby for the rest of his life. Yet Darby was able to learn a lesson from this experience. He pursued a career in Life Insurance and never let a "no" discourage him. He went on to become highly successful and wealthy by never giving up.
Shawn and I discussed how the universe will often throw the most significant challenges to people right when they are on the cusp of a breakthrough. The key is to never stop. Shawn thanked me for the sandwich and the time and conversation. He asked for my favorite book, and I recommended "Become What You Are" by Alan Watts. He told me he would read it when he checked himself into rehab. I am inspired by people like Shawn, who can maintain a positive outlook despite facing some of the most challenging circumstances life can throw at them. I encouraged him to not give up and let him know that I believed in him and that he was close to breaking through. He said "You don't know what this conversation means to me, so many people judge and treat me like shit without knowing anything that I am going through."
In closing, it is crucial to be kind. Be open-minded and give people a chance. We all are battling things that other people aren't aware of. We all are trying our best to navigate this modern world where people are only deemed valuable if they are generating a profit for someone else. I encourage anyone reading this to get involved with your local non-profit. Stop and talk to the next person you encounter living on the street. Introduce yourself and ask their name. I promise they have a story, and it's worth your time listening.
